It all started when I stumbled upon an Instagram reel. A person tried to compare fictional men with real men, and before they could finish, a book lover (fictionally) “shot” them for even entertaining such a blasphemous thought. Overdramatic? Perhaps. Relatable? Absolutely. Because, let’s face it, real men don’t hold a candle to fictional ones. So, here I am, diving into the ultimate showdown: Book vs. Real Men.
Healthy Obsession
Fictional men know how to prioritize their women, and they don’t hold back. They’re the kind of guys who can’t keep their hands off their girlfriend the moment they see her—forehead kisses in public, tight embraces, whispered “I need you” in the heat of the moment. Compare that to a real-life “you look nice” text, and you start to see the appeal. Real men may call you pretty, but William Shakespeare once wrote, “If I were to kiss you then go to hell, I would. So, then I can brag with the devils I saw heaven without entering it.” Who’s winning now?
Openly affectionate men are top tier. Every time they walk by you, you get a kiss or a hug or an ass slap. Just consistent display of attraction.
Intentional Dating
In fiction, relationships often come with purpose—to love, to grow, to build a future. It’s not about casual flings or temporary arrangements; it’s about forever. Fictional men say things like, “You really think I would let you go? We’re in this together. You and me. Forever.” Or better yet: “She deserves better, but I can’t see her with anyone else. So, I’ll become better.” Meanwhile, in reality, modern dating seems more about “fun” and less about connection.
I am not made for hookup culture. Love me for an eternity or do not touch me at all.
Grand Confessions
There’s nothing subtle about a fictional man’s love confession. It’s dramatic, heartfelt, and often comes with flowers, love letters, or an unexpected grand gesture. One memorable fictional quote goes: “I’m not the best at flowery language, so I’ll keep it simple. I never believed in love. Never wanted it….. But then I met you…” It’s raw, personal, and unforgettable. Real men, take notes.
Effort Matters
Let’s talk about effort. Have you ever read about a fictional billionaire transforming his rooftop into a private theater, complete with all your favorite snacks, slow music, and a romantic dance under the stars? Romance isn’t about money; it’s about gestures. And fictional men have mastered the art of making their partners feel loved every single day.
Worshiping the Ground You Walk On
This phrase is often misunderstood, but in fiction, it means respecting, cherishing, and valuing your partner above all else. Fictional men show their love not just with words but with actions that scream devotion. It’s not about being submissive; it’s about mutual reverence. Real men could learn a thing or two here. – If you ever see me in a relationship, just know that man worships the ground I walk on(I know I am going to die alone).
Dark but Sweet for You
We can’t ignore the allure of the dark, brooding fictional anti-hero who’d burn the world just to see you smile. He’s the kind of man who’d kill without hesitation but melts into tenderness at your touch. It’s a paradox that’s hard to resist. The infamous line, “I’d burn the world for you,” truly captures the peak of fictional romance. No wonder, readers fall for villains so often.
Admiration and Desperation
“If you saw yourself the way I see you, you’d never doubt again.” Fictional men admire their partners with a desperation that’s intoxicating. Their love is all-consuming, and their words are laced with poetic admiration. Real men might love deeply, but let’s admit it, they rarely verbalize it with the same intensity. Fictional men energy – “it’s okay to murder people but it’s never okay to disrespect your wife”.
Jealousy Done Right
A little jealousy never hurt anyone—at least not in fiction. Take Christian Harper, who was jealous of a unicorn just for hugging Stella. Fictional men’s jealousy often stems from their overwhelming love and protectiveness, which somehow feels more romantic than toxic.
“I’m not jealous, I’m territorial. Jealous is when you want something that isn’t yours. Territorial is protecting what is already yours.” Fictional men are so territorial about their women.
Nicknames That Steal Hearts
“Love.” “Butterfly.” “Sunshine.” Fictional men have a knack for coming up with the most heart-melting nicknames. These names aren’t just terms of endearment; they’re reflections of how deeply they adore and cherish their partners. And let’s be real, how often does a real guy call you “miacara” and mean it?
Final Thoughts
It’s not that real men are all bad; it’s just that fictional men set an impossibly high standard. They’re written to perfection, crafted to make us swoon, and designed to fulfill our deepest romantic fantasies. So, while real men live in the realm of possibility, fictional men will always reign supreme in the kingdom of our hearts. Romance is so much more beautiful in the books. No man alive can compete with that world.
Make sure to follow me on my social handles for more such updates! Instagram! Pinterest! And more book reviews here!